Motherhood: How to deal with your frustration

IT’S NOT OK: It’s ok to feel frustration or irritation but it it’s not ok to put those emotions on our kids. The feelings belong to you - not them. If you continue, the cycle will never be broken - all that negative baggage will be handed down from generation to generation - over and over again. YOU CAN BE THE ONE TO STOP IT. Our children deserve better. Even if you are not a mother yet, you can begin to clean up your frustration and irritation. Both were rooted in your own childhood. Perhaps you were silenced, blamed, humiliated, not given enough love or something along those lines. You need to listen to your inner child, so that you can guide the next generation. This is important. You are important. Here are my my tips for healing.

In the moment action step: Take deep breaths and repeat the following until YOU have calmed dow: “This frustration is mine. My child is innocent. I allow myself to feel and release.” You may want to physically leave the room.

Long term action step: get a paper and pen. Allow YOUR LITTLE GIRL to express herself and write out all her frustrations, sadness and/anger. Give her space to tell her story. (Your little girl can be any age or many).

Do you have questions? Let’s take a load off the next generation ❤️ Mama (or mama-to-be), you got this.

Love,

Your Life Coach Filippa

Happiness is a choice

Yes ladies, I'm officially back to blogging. I missed sharing my daily tips and information with you. I can't believe it's been 5 years - lots happened... Divorced, new husband, became a mother (and a step mom), sold my juice business, etc. So many life lessons! It has not been easy, but it has been a beautiful experience that has provided many opportunities for inner growth. I have so much to share with all of you.

I want to kick this post off with the theme of happiness. Something many of us try to experience but seem to be blocked by a number of things such as fear, worry, anxiety, sadness, irritation or frustration. Any of those apply to you? They sure do to me. Just because I am a life coach doesn't mean I don't go through the lessons with you guys.

This blog is meant to help you take your power back. But in order to do so, you need to admit that your life is 100% your responsibility. Agree? There is nobody else that will do this for you. I always wanted someone to save me from my misery, but realised after many years - painful years - that no night in shining armour was coming to rescue. I had to rescue myself. And this is exactly what i want to remind you to do as well.

So let's get into our theme - happiness. It is a choice. Happiness is your choice. In any moment we can choose happiness. Even when life seems so dark. It's always a possibility.

Action Step: Today, as many times as you can, when your mind drifts of into fear - do your best to choose happiness in the moment. You don't need to even think about the future... Just  focus on the moment. If you need to, tell a joke, do something you love - anything. Start training the mind to turn to positivity. Get away from negative thought patterns.

As I do on Instagram, I will also be answering questions here. So ask me anything in the comments below. I am happy to help. 

It feels good to be back. Hope you feel the same.

Love,

Your Life Coach Filippa

Be Ready for Life

ONE THING I ALWAYS TELL MY CLIENTS... Get yourself ready for life everyday! And by that I mean, make yourself presentable and wear clothing that lifts up your ENERGY. Personally, I always want to be ready for my most important meeting. I never want a slouchy outfit to be an excuse or the reason I say "no" to anything. So clean out your closet and get ride of pieces that don't give you good vibes. I'm 9 months pregnant but still do my best to rock it - even on Sundays. It's not superficial; it's self-love. Today's look is from Scotch & Soda.

The Best Skincare Products

I don't spend a tone of time on skincare. My routine has consisted of a face wash and occasional oil for moisture. But I am 35 years old and want to tend towards my skin more - just a little more self care on the face front.

In Miami, I discovered this new line - Tata Harper Skincare. I am obsessed. It's perfect for me and leaves my skin soft, moist and glowing. It's GMO free, no toxins, natural, eco certified, not tested on animals, and no artificial colors or fragrances.

They have a big line of varied products, but here are the ones that I purchased.

Repairitive Moisture

Moisturising Mask - won the Beauty Choice Award from New Beauty

Regenerating Cleanser

I got them at Saks Fifth Avenue but they are available on their website and my friend mentioned NK in Sweden.

Oh and most of their bottles are glass. Thumbs up!

What are you thankful for?

5 DAYS OF GRATITUDE: Yesterday my coaching client told me about a exercise she’s doing - writing down 100 things she’s grateful for under 30 days straight. So I thought maybe some of you want to do this but a lighter version with me? Let’s write down 50 THINGS  we are GRATEFUL for under 5 days starting tomorrow. Let’s shift our perspective and awareness to seeing WHAT WE HAVE, instead of seeing what we lack. Our ego is good at reminding us of that... and we need to put down our foot. You with me? 

Let it come up for healing

I accept everything that wants to come up for healing. 

Lately I have had a bit of resistant to feelings and sensations that want to come up the surface and I have tried to control them instead. Attempting to ignore them or pushing them away. Maybe you recognise this pattern in yourself? And during my morning meditation, the above affirmation just popped up in my mind. Don't fight it any longer, just let it heal. Just accept things as they are, as they were.

All of my life I have used food to push these emotions away - that's not an option for me today.

I want to allow myself more time just to sit with the pain, hurt and sadness and not cover it up with perfectionism. And not be afraid of my darkness. It is by examining our dark corners that we find the map towards the light. It's been a long journey for me to get here, 35 years to be exact, but I am ready to let go of at least a big chunk. And be more open to releasing the past without guilt.

If you want to do your own work, just try to sit with your eyes closed and simply observe your breath. Just start here. You just need to observe yourself without judgement - that is all that is required of you. And try to do this when you're mind is crazy bananas. Don't let the ego mind take over with fear and worry. Love is our only reality. Fear is just an illusion.

Be the observer and not the judge. 

Love Filippa

Self-responsibility

Recently I have been reminded of one thing. And if you actually take action steps to implement this belief, it will change your life. Ready?

Ok, you are only responsible for yourself. This is not selfish, on the contrary, this is self-love. We try to control those around us, we take in their opinion and give away our power - just to end up feeling sad and depleted.

So why are we always trying to take responsibly for other people? Most likely because we were brought up as children without the full support that we needed during childhood and observed adults acting as kids - screaming, fighting, crying, etc. We didn't feel 100 procent cared for, or protected by grown ups. During this stage we were formed and moulded by their behaviour. We are not trying to blame our parents here, we are just becoming aware of various factors that have lead us to act a certain way and how it effects us today. You with me? So don't go calling your mom after this... really, she did her best too.

How can you start living your life and take responsibility for yourself?

1. Write down a list of things that are important to you in life. How do you want to spend your time on earth?
2. Don't take anyone's comments or opinions personal. They are only talking about themselves anyways.
3. "Clean up your side of the street" - which is my favourite quote from Gabrielle Bernstein. It basically says, take a look at your own garbage, your own negative behaviour and blockages and start tying up.

If you have any questions on this subject, feel free to write to me in the comments below. Remember, change starts with you. xoxo

Celebration of Love

Jimmy & I decided that our wedding was about our love and had a small ceremony in Egypt together with William & Paola.

We wrote our own commitments to each other. And believe that marriage is about a living life together but remaining our own source.

Our key words: acceptance, freedom, love and support. That is what we want to give each other throughout life.

If you're getting married, don't stress about the dress, bridesmaids, band, photographer, etc. Remember why this day is special for you and your partner.

My wedding dress is from Lulus.

Gems in your City

It's easy to just spend the weekend on your sofa watching Game of Thrones and eating a pizza, but there is so much more out there...

See your city from the eyes of a tourist and go explore. Try something completely new. Last year, as Jimmy and I were exploring Stockholm and we found a new brunch spot at Hotel Skeppsholmen.

We go there for romantic weekend breakfasts and get in a little power walk on the way over there.

These are pics from Saturday's return.

xoxo

Day 10: Make Truthful Decisions

DAY 10 - MAKE TRUTHFUL DECISIONS:

We often abandon ourself for the wants, needs and opinions of other people. For example, choosing a profession because our parents suggest it or wearing a certain outfit because society thinks it’s trendy for the moment. So let’s pause here and check in with YOU. Decisions that are right for you - those feel good inside. That’s how you know they are true and leading you in a positive direction.

DAILY EXERCISE: Take inventory of your decisions and choices today - which ones feel good? Which ones make you happy?

DAY 9: You are the Source

DAY 9 - YOU ARE THE SOURCE:

Remember that you are love. That is the core energy of your existence. The soul is made of love. You don’t need to search for it in another human being. Love is complete, not partial. You are exactly what your seeking. You are love.

DAILY EXERCISE: Write down a list of ways that you seek love outside yourself – for example in a partner, food, shopping, drugs, cocktails, parent, etc.

Day 8: Meditation Sensation

DAY 8 - MEDITATION SENSATION:

Spend some time with YOU and get to know yourself a little better by just closing your eyes. This is a very loving act.

DAILY EXERCISE: Meditate for 5 minutes today by focusing your attention on your breath - in and out through your nose. This is called anapana meditation. It trains your mind to focus. It also allows your mind to be quiet and still, alert and aware of all within. Simply sit with yourself - that’s it.

Day 7: Stop the Blame Game

DAY 7 - STOP THE BLAME GAME:

We love to point fingers and place responsibility for our own pain and inner suffering on other people in our life. We don’t know how to handle the feeling of worthlessness, fears and blocked energy within. SO we through it out in hopes of feeling temporarily better.

DAILY EXERCISE: Become conscious of who you give your negativity to and what you actually need to deal with instead.

Day 6: Full Acceptance

DAY 6 - ACCEPTANCE:

We are really good at finding faults, the negative and pointing out the body parts we want to change. We allow that little miss perfect voice to nag about the size of our stomach, the width of our thighs, the flab on our arms, the wrinkle on our face, the lifeless hair - do you need more examples? It’s actually pretty sad that we spend so much time on this instead of appreciating our gift.

DAILY EXERCISE: Acceptance is the first step. Sit down in meditation pose and hug yourself with your arms (like in he photo) with your eyes closed. Scan your body up and down worth your awareness, and as you pass each body part repeat the following in your mind: “I love and accept my ___________.” Fill in the blank with the specific body part.

Day 5: Crowding Out

DAY 5 - CROWDING OUT:

Your body needs the right nutrients for optimal health. That’s the easy part to understand. Now it’s time to get to action and provide it with meals that are made with love. I want to help you make this fun too.

TODAY’S EXERCISE is all about a concept called “crowding out.” It’s all about ADDING IN FOODS that your intuition/body wants and letting foods that you don’t want get crowded out and very little space in your life. Add in the vibrant meals packed with vitamins and minerals, protein, good fats and carbs and you won’t want the sugar and junk.

Day 4: Listen to your Body

DAY 4 - LISTEN TO YOUR BODY:

It makes no mistakes, and functions perfectly every single day. Your heart doesn’t skip a beat, your temperature is controlled, your elimination system is always working. Your entire bodily system is focused on homeostasis at all times - keeping everything in balance - even when you’re sleeping like a baby.

DAILY EXERCISE: Today, only eat if you’re hungry and end your meals when you feel full. Start noticing how your body communicates hunger and fullness. Don’t let your mind override orders from your body. Listen to your body’s guidance - let it direct your actions

Day 3: Universal Wisdom

DAY 3 – TUNE IN TO UNIVERSAL WISDOM:

The universe is constantly presenting you with opportunities to connect – it wants to guide you step by step back to love. It wants you to return to yourself.

DAILY EXERCISE: Notice the message trying to reach your consciousness – it’s usually a thought, word or situation that keeps repeating itself. What have you been missing that’s important for you to recognize?

Day 2: You are a Power Woman

DAY 2 - POWER WOMAN:

Step out of victimhood and welcome your power woman. She wants space in your life… and lots of it. It’s time to move the pity party to another location and make way for the that strong, independent, fearless female that has been waiting for her invitation to fully entire your life again.

DAILY EXERCISE: Describe your inner power woman in three words. Write down the words on a piece of paper and stick it on your bathroom mirror. Remind yourself that it’s ok to let her shine.

Day 1: Dress for success baby

Self-Love Rituals Series

DAY 1 - DRESS FOR SUCCESS:

Pick an outfit that makes you feel vibrant and lifts your energy. If there are pieces of clothing that drain you – time to clean out your closet and throw them out. You know exactly what I’m talking about… that sweater in the back that hasn’t been worn in over three years or the underwear with the big whole.

DAILY EXERCISE: Treat your body like a temple today and get dressed with respect. Put on clothing that lifts your energy and brings out your power woman.

Self-Love Ritual Series

SELF-LOVE RITUAL SERIES 🧘🏽‍♀️📿 starts tomorrow...

Are you ready to love yourself a little bit more? And quiet down the negative voice in your head? Stop doubting your body and ability - trust me, you’re worth the effort.

Join me for 12 days of self connection, love and acceptance here on the blog and on my Instagram @rawclarityfilippa. The best way to help the world, is to start with ourself.

TRY THIS NOW: Check in! On a scale of 1-10, how much self love are you experiencing at this very moment?

Healthy Miami Spots

Miami is my home town - spent most of my time growing up there. And I'm always finding an excuses to go back. So good thing my best friend is giving birth in March - yet another reason to book a ticket there.

Miami is often connected to "partying, neon bikinis on the beach, and sun-burned tourists." Let me show you the other side of this city. Here are my favorite spots to visit when in town...

JUICES: Jugo Fresh

BEST FOR LUNCH: Glaser Farms (only Saturdays), Ice Box, Wholefoods (grab & go)

BEST FOR DINNER: Lucali (pizza), Pub belly (sushi), Michael's Genuine (mix), Mandolin (Greek), Kyo (fusion)

STROLLING: Wynwood area - stop by for coffee att panther and check out the Wyndwood Walls of graffiti art

POWERWALK: Over the Key Biscayne bridge - gorgeous view and good butt workout

We represent lululemon

Jimmy and I got a little surprise att Yoga Games this weekend from lululemon. We are officially there ambassadors! This brand not only has the BEST yoga pants (without competition) but stands for all the important values that Raw Clarity does - supporting our community, giving people a chance to feel good and living a balanced lifestyle.

We can't wait to share our upcoming events with lululemon... Keep checking in for updates. xoxo

Describe Your Power Woman

She's in there - yep, your power woman. The female that stays true, strong, and focused on her reason for being her.

It's safe for you to let go of that little girl instead now and step into your power. 

Writing Exercise: Describe your power woman in three words

My power is genuine, determined and truthful - and here to be of service.

I love watching her grow everyday and unfold her magic.

Three Tips for Self-Love

Here is the deal. Everything you will ever need can only be found within yourself. So, this can also be applied to love. We search for love in many places like a partner, food, travels, clothing - yet, don't feel completely fulfilled. That's because the love you're really looking for exists within you.

To love yourself, you have to remove the blocks standing in the way. You have to return to yourself. How ever far you choose to wander on the road to self-sabotage, it's time to come back!

Here is how to get started...

1.) Notice when you're inner critic is having a field day and sending out negative/mean thoughts about you or those around you. Just become aware of the things you say to yourself. And try to replace them with truthful loving thoughts instead.

2.) Be prepared for life by practicing daily self-care. Get dressed for success, keep your body clean, fix your hair - look presentable in your way - not according to society's ideals.

3.) Meditation - give yourself 5 minutes per day for inner reflection, peace and emotional detox.

Back & Ready to Rock

Ahh it feels really good to sit down and blog again. Been out of this world for almost two years since my time at Aftonbladet & Metro. I needed to go deeper into myself, ripe of another layer and meet my vulnerability. It was bitter sweet, but worth the work.

So here I am after a divorce, new marriage, leaving the old and entering the new. Well that's what life is all about right? Choosing to re-create the latest version of ourself, each and very moment. Watching every situation in our life rise and pass; come and go. I was reminded these past months to be the observer and not react so much to life. Observation creates an effortless flow. It allows life to happen "for you," instead of "to you." As an observer there is more room for peace, happiness and love. When we are constantly reacting to the outside world, we loose our sense of calm, inner peace and presence.

There is lots to share. I have mostly been a student and now I'm ready to be of service, be a teacher and continue sharing my ongoing life lessons. My posts will be filled with self-love tips, tools for creating a full-filled life and ways to remove the fears that block you from being truly happy.

No one single person is your enemy. Your thoughts are the only enemy - they are the only thing that can stand in your way to achieving, creating and loving. 

I'm here to help, so please send my any questions that may be on your mind.

Love Filippa